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A day in the life of a BMW driver

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  • A day in the life of a BMW driver

    The other day I was cruising along as usual, coming onto one of my motorways which was very busy with inferior cars.

    First off, I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road!

    I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway!

    The driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn.

    Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane.

    Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110 mph enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me,I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway but was driving at a ridiculous 70 mph!

    Naturally, I got within a foot of his rea r bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him that he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.

    Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me!

    He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.

    Needless to say, I was eager to oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already know - that my car goes fast!

    Apparently, he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my drivers licence to a police station to be sent away to have some points put on! (They're not free points either - they're 20 each and I was only allowed 3)

    But the man at the police station said that because I drive a BMW, it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points and then I won't even NEED a driving licence so they will take it off me!

    See, now THAT'S the sort of respect you get when you own and drive a BMW!
    Last edited by tony-1977; 18-07-2013, 05:36 PM.
    [COLOR=#0000ff][I][B]Drive a 2013 (62) Vauxhall Corsa S 1.0 Ecoflex. Owned by me since February 2013.
    [/B][/I][/COLOR][COLOR=#ff8c00][I][B]Tutorials can be found [URL="http://www.thecorsa.co.uk/tutorials/"]here[/URL]. Search the forum [URL="http://www.thecorsa.co.uk/search.php"]here[/URL].[/B][/I][/COLOR]

  • #2
    funny thing is, most Cop cars around my areas have bmws.

    Did you write this yourself?

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Iby View Post
      Did you write this yourself?
      Had it passed on to me in an email at work
      [COLOR=#0000ff][I][B]Drive a 2013 (62) Vauxhall Corsa S 1.0 Ecoflex. Owned by me since February 2013.
      [/B][/I][/COLOR][COLOR=#ff8c00][I][B]Tutorials can be found [URL="http://www.thecorsa.co.uk/tutorials/"]here[/URL]. Search the forum [URL="http://www.thecorsa.co.uk/search.php"]here[/URL].[/B][/I][/COLOR]

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      • #4
        I find these days Audi drivers are the new BMW drivers
        .

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        • #5
          Originally posted by KingoStarr View Post
          I find these days Audi drivers are the new BMW drivers
          And the indicators for both makes never seem to work
          [COLOR=#0000ff][I][B]Drive a 2013 (62) Vauxhall Corsa S 1.0 Ecoflex. Owned by me since February 2013.
          [/B][/I][/COLOR][COLOR=#ff8c00][I][B]Tutorials can be found [URL="http://www.thecorsa.co.uk/tutorials/"]here[/URL]. Search the forum [URL="http://www.thecorsa.co.uk/search.php"]here[/URL].[/B][/I][/COLOR]

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          • #6
            Seems like it was writing by a peasant who was jealous of someone having a nicer car.
            Originally posted by Dave
            Originally posted by Stephen Fry
            [B]"It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so ****ing what."

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            • #7
              Originally posted by KingoStarr View Post
              I find these days Audi drivers are the new BMW drivers
              This

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              • #8

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Tim View Post
                  Seems like it was writing by a peasant who was jealous of someone having a nicer car.
                  Typical BMW owner.
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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Lee View Post
                    Typical BMW owner.
                    I'm currently a peasant
                    Originally posted by Dave
                    Originally posted by Stephen Fry
                    [B]"It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so ****ing what."

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